the worst thing i think i’ve ever had to find out, is that my 23 year old cousin has leukimeau, it’s a blood cancer. it was something i had never thought would happen to someone in my family in such a random moment. Finding this out hurt me so badly, from the moment i found out i went completely of track, i lost all the confidence i had, lost alot of friends. i treated people badly, got into alot of trouble at school, and just didnt care about anything for a long time. The past 8months have been so hard. Everything just felt like it was going wrong, i felt like the only people i could talk to was my mum. Even though i knew my cousin wasnt the only person who had been diagnosed with cancer in my family before, it hurt me the most because my both nans died from a cancer. I was scared of loosing her. The past 3months, ive started to begin to be the old me again. Ive got people back which i lost. My cousin has had her line taken out. She is still having her chemo therapy. She’s getting better. She’s still fighting for her life while she’s gone back to college to train to be a hairdresser. Since she got ill i see things in a completely different way to what i did before. She’s made our family so proud, her little boy whos 6 understands so much its unbelievable. it annoys me when people say ‘i want to die’ ’ my lifes shit’ ‘why am i here?’ its selfish, they should be greatful for their lives, because other people fight for their lives, and other people want to live but havent got the choice. Dont judge people because you dont know whats going on behind closed doors unless your actually there with them. theres a reason for everything. im so proud of my cousin for just getting on with her life and living every minute of it like its her last even when she feels at her worst!